The post is developed in partnership with BetterHelp.

 

Dating is never easy but can be even more complicated if you have a child. Much of your time is dedicated to your child, from helping them with homework, driving them to sports practice, or spending quality time with them. This may leave you with less energy or time to date than when you were childless. 

 

Furthermore, you need to consider your child’s needs when dating again. This is even more crucial if you are just coming from divorcing your child’s other parent. Chances are, you haven’t dated since before your child was born and therefore aren’t quite sure how to juggle dating with your new responsibilities. Your actions and lifestyle no longer just affect you; they also affect the most important person in your life: your child. 

 

Therefore, if you struggle to find love as a single parent, here are some tips for getting back on the dating scene while still being a great parent. 

Take It Slow

If you just divorced or broke up with your significant other, it is important not to jump into a relationship right away. You need time to heal from the breakup and process your emotions. Otherwise, you may choose your next partner purely out of desperation and loneliness, which could have significant consequences and cause you even more pain. 

 

Furthermore, your child needs time to heal from the breakup too. Divorces are major traumatic events in a child’s life, and their whole world and foundation have crumbled beneath them. They may be shocked or even upset and angry if someone new comes over shortly after the divorce. 

 

The breakup didn’t just affect you, and dating new partners won’t just affect you either. Therefore, give both you and your child time to adjust and heal from the divorce before dating again. This timeframe can be as soon as a few months or may even take a year or longer

 

Dating is never easy, especially christian dating but can be even more complicated if you have a child. Much of your time is dedicated to your child, from helping them with homework, driving them to sports practice, or spending quality time with them. This may leave you with less energy or time to date than when you were childless.

 

Be Transparent With Your Child

When you feel you are finally ready to date again, it is essential to discuss this decision with your child. If you bring someone over without discussing your desire to date prior, then they will get quite a shock. 

 

Many parents forgo this step because they don’t know how to have this conversation with their kids. The truth is that the conversation may be a bit uncomfortable, but it is essential. Your child needs to understand that you are moving on to other partners. 

 

Some children have fantasies that their parents will get back together, and others may believe that their parents won’t date again. Having this conversation sets up more realistic expectations that you won’t be getting back together with their other parent, but you aren’t going to be alone forever either. 

Don’t Talk Too Much About Your Child Right Away

When going on a date with someone new, it can be quite tempting to talk about your kid a lot. However, this can be a bit overwhelming for a first or second date, especially if they don’t have kids of their own! 

 

Furthermore, your date wants to know about you: your career, personality, interests, etc. Although children can take up a significant portion of your life, they aren’t your whole personality. Talk about your other interests, career goals and achievements, and who you are. This date is about you, so make sure your date learns how amazing you are. 

But Don’t Hide Their Existence Either

However, you shouldn’t hide the fact that you have a child, either. This will surely make it far more difficult to find a partner who is supportive and understanding of your situation. That’s why you should make this clear as soon as possible, either on your dating profile or mention it on your first date. That way, you don’t waste time with someone who will never love or support your child the way you need them to. 

Freshen Yourself Up

It can be easy to ignore self-care when you are exhausted from taking care of the kids, running errands, and keeping the house clean. However, taking care of yourself and making sure you look your best is essential for attracting new dates. 

 

This doesn’t mean you need to get a manicure or put seven layers of makeup on. Just do enough to freshen yourself up and look and feel your best. That means forgoing the oversized sweatpants when going grocery shopping or making sure your hair is brushed before walking outside. Also, find yourself some clothes that fit your style but are still comfy and cute as well. 

Make Your Child A Priority

Having a child changes everything. You won’t have the same availability or energy as before you had a family. You will have to set boundaries on your time or what activities you can participate in so that you still have time and energy for your child. 

 

Furthermore, always remember that your child is the number one most important person in your life. Don’t settle for anyone who doesn’t understand or respect that. If you find yourself dating someone who is disrespectful to your child or doesn’t care for them, then you need to break things off. The perfect partner will love both you and your child and respect the bond you share. Sticking with anything less is just settling and can ruin your relationship with your child.

Bottom Line

Life can be quite difficult and confusing when being a newly single parent. However, this doesn’t mean that you should give up dating or that it will never be an option. With some consideration for your child and appropriate boundaries, you can find love in this new phase of your life while still being a great parent. 

 

For more tips on dating and relationships, click on the link below for further reading: 

 

https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/dating/